Let’s talk about the elephant in the room first. There is no way that Stone Smoked Vanilla beer is better than Smoked Porter Pounder even though the scores clearly indicate such. Although The Ministry did convene for this judgement which can put the fate of some of these beers at the mercy of lesser refined palates, this rarely ever moves the needle more than a couple of tenths of a percent. I think the reason may have more to do with the fact that I smelled like gasoline on this night. I had just gone across town to look at a couple of El Caminos this guy was selling out of Pasadena and one engine was running kind of rich. He had about a dozen junkers, El Caminos included, and had converted a semi trailer into his living quarters. Said he replaced the original with a 350, and kept revving and revving it for me, but the exhaust on this windless night was forming a bigger and bigger dome around us. I kindly declined a deal on either and rubbed the shit out of my burning eyes as I drove home to drink this beer.
This smokebeer will not convert anyone over to the smoke world because the smoke is strong enough to be comfortably noticable. This beer became less and less rewarding after every sip and developed a tart sting to it, almost sour. Having said that, this may have to be a “do over” given the gas contamination debacle.
|Brewer||Ass Kisser Beverage Co.|
|Beer Name||Porter Pounder Smoked Porter|
|Brewer’s Description||Ass Kisser Porter Pounder is dark and rich balanced ale that is smooth and yet structured with light coffee and mocha aromas. The subtle smoky aroma lures your palate to sip through the dark tan head.|
|Food Pairings||Good with spicy foods.|
|Brewer Location||San Jose, CA, or Ukiah CA, or Fort Worth, TX or Austrailia|
|Alcohol content by volume||8.0%|
|IBU (International Bitterness Units)||36|
|Beer opacity rate 1 – 7 (light – dark)||4.333|
|Smell smoke? 1 – 7 (No – George Burns)||2.667|
|Sausage detection? Y or N||N|
|Smokepower taste: 1 – 7 Smokestacks||2.667|
|Overall Happiness Rating: 1-7 (low – high)||3.75|
I still don’t know if these guys exist, and I’ve been searching for years. Here’s all the info I can find: