Not a smokebeer. But why am I happy? It’s good beer! Why is there a drawing of a seagull smoking a cigarette on the can? I don’t know, but I bet there’s an employee at Half Acre with a personal story explaining that, and I bet they share it while giving tours, and I don’t want to hear that story right now. There’s no smoke in this beer. Zero. But grapefruit? hmm, maybe. About five years ago my sister in law, who is from New Jersey, asked me if I’d ever had any Half Acre beer. I said yes. I don’t know why she asked that, maybe I’ll find out after I post this review. The word smoke appearing in the name of this beer is misleading. I wonder if Half Acre knows about smokebeers? Making the world aware of smokebeers is in our mission statement… I’ll send them an email and ask. Question: Are good listeners typically people who listen to lots of music? Are people who listen to lots of music using music to avoid hearing their own thoughts? Are they avoiding the labor of creating thoughts? Are good listeners lazy people who feel too burdened to contribute equitable feedback to conversations? I listen to lots of music. I’ll explore the “hate on good listeners” tangent at some other time, maybe at one of my wife’s work parties. And since I’m on tangents, I recommend the streaming service Tidal (unpaid promotion). Overall beer happiness experience rating = 4 out of 7 notasmokebeer honorary smokestacks.
| Brewer | Half Acre Brewing |
| Name | Smoking Gull |
| Brewer’s Description | Brewing some beers only once a year, the memory of them becomes the dominant part of the relationship. The actual experience enjoying Smoking Gull stands very tall against the praise we all offer it when it’s not around. The recipe holds true. Citra & Mosaic on a very soft malt base. Super vivid flavors. Smoking Gull is a heaving success. Half Acre loves pale ale. We honor the Gull, a beautiful, thieving water bird. |
| Food Pairings | Heavy American food, except not hamburgers. No beef. |
| Brewer Location | Chicago, IL |
| Alcohol content by volume | 5.2% |
| IBU | People are saying “no IBU” |
| Beer opacity rate 1 – 7 (light – dark) | 2 |
| Smell smoke? 1 – 7 (No – George Burns) | 1 = No |
| Smokepower taste: 1 – 7 Smokestacks | 1 = No, I guess we should say zero, not 1. But 1 is as low as it goes, that’s how it works, so I guess it’s 1. |
| Sausage detection? Y or N | N, which stands for No, No sausage detected. |
| Beer thickness, 1-7 (water – used motor oil) | 3 |
| Overall Happiness Rating: 1-7 (low – high) | 4 honorary smokestacks |
Half Acre has a good website, I bet they’re paying someone to look after this. Which all brewers should do:
Smoking Gull
I’m actually going to try this website inside a website feature… Oh, looks like it does the same thing:
SmokeBeerMinistry 